Jakarta, Sunday: The Australian Foreign Minister, Alexander Downer, today threw the honorary first pitch in an exhibition diplomatic softball game with Indonesia.

Somewhat against protocol the lead Indonesian batter, a militia member described only as "unconnected with the Indonesian Military", belted a perspiring Mr Downer's underarm pitch out of the park.

The exhibition match follows a long history of impromptu matches between the two nations, played mainly on Indonesian soil under Indonesian rules. "Softball is much more fun and easy than baseball, or 'hardball', as my American friends Bill and Madeline call it," Downer said.

Australia has traditionally resisted the American game of baseball or "hardball" on the grounds that it isn't cricket. On occasion teams have been involved in a much tougher game, competing in tournaments arranged by the United States, such as the infamous "grudge match" against Saddam Hussein played in Kuwait, and the more recent NATO Round Robin in the Balkans.

"We actually did invite the USA to come over here to play hardball against the Indonesians in East Timor, but they just didn't seem interested." Downer said.

Australia was kept scoreless throughout the game until Australia revealed a secret "pinch" hitter. Major General Peter Cosgrove scored belated home runs in each of the last two Australian innings, leaving the final score at Indonesia 97 Australia 2 . Cosgrove's amazing ability to do his job adequately saw him almost immediately become a national hero.

At a post game press conference a jubilant Downer said he was looking forward to establishing official diplomatic softball links with other nations in the region. "Malaysia is at the top of our list" he said, adding, "if that's OK with Dr Mahathir of course."

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